I'm Am Not A Robot

“Select all photos with traffic lights.” 

Have you ever compared your store management life to the robot log ins on purchasing websites? I’m guessing it feels like a never-ending battle to engage and be different from the norm. As you know, retail is a peculiar beast compared to other industries. It isn’t a 9-5 job and each day varies from the last, but sometimes the way you are managed or the way you manage your team can be very robotic. 

Do this. Do that. Not enough payroll. Not enough hours in the day to finish a project. A no call no show. The same customer returns merchandise… again. Another customer makes a complaint for a better discount. Employees crying in the bathroom. Cell phones on the sales floor. More markdowns. Moving merch from the front to the back. Moving that same merchandise from the back to the front. Last minute promos. Trash left in the fitting room. Go backs. “How are you today?” Schedule changes. These are just a few things that can pop up during a day. With so much going on inside the store, why are employees bored out of their minds? 

The answer is YOU. If you are feeling like you are on a never-ending loop, then you aren’t doing your job to the best of your ability. Of course, you like things done a certain way. You have routines. You have been doing it that way for a long time, but how about changing perspective and processes a bit? How about empowering your people? I know it sounds simple, but in reality, if you are going through the same motions of managing your people on a daily basis with all the crazy going on in your store, you are not doing the job of managing. You are just…doing.

Employees crave a sense of accomplishment. Herzberg said it best with his Motivation/Hygiene Theory. I am paraphrasing here; to reach true fulfillment one has to feel like they are a part of something and fulfilled, supported and challenged. If an employee feels no sense of accomplishment or direction, boredom and job dissatisfaction ensue. As the store leader, it is your job to foster a work environment that enhances job responsibilities and makes your team want to come to work every day. When was the last time you expressed an interest or really talked to your people? Asked them what they need from you to feel challenged? Took notes and learned something new? On the other hand, when was the last time your boss really had a direct conversation with you concerning your needs? Meant what they said? Answered the hard questions? Helped with a concern?

I write this with the hope it will help motivate yourself AND those you work with to change the process. You must ask the right questions of your team and open up a bit. It’s not easy, but your people will thank you for it. Your boss will thank you for it. It takes guts to ask for help or change your mind set, but you will be worthier of a management title for doing so. Your team will feel better about their future and your store will run smoothly knowing it is an ever-changing environment where people feel empowered to make decisions and not fear mistakes. So instead of going through the everyday motions of do this or do that, how about taking a more democratic approach by asking someone how they would accomplish the task at hand. Try it. You may just like what you hear.

Leadership and Dissent

If you want to be a strong leader you have to have people around that challenge you and your opinions; push your buttons and speak up when they don’t agree with your ideas. Leadership and dissent are a necessity in the world of running a business. Especially in regard to running a store. I have witnessed many managers view those with differing opinions as a thorn in their side and oftentimes those employees were coached out of a job. Why? Because the “leader” didn’t like being second guessed. Seems oddly familiar, right?

Although it can be incredibly difficult to manage people who are constantly judging you and questioning your every move, it is important to remember that these people are not in your shoes and don’t always understand the gravity of certain situations. However, they are there to impact your thinking positively and push you to be a better version of yourself. You cannot have strong leadership without dissent. You just can’t. For anyone who says otherwise, they probably have never been in a leadership role or they have probably never had great leadership in their careers to relate to. Just because you hold a manager or business owner title doesn’t mean you are a true leader. Many people get that confused. A true leader inspires growth in position, personal development and encourages people to do and be the same for others.

So…how do you embrace the opinions? How do you find that special someone to have by your side that isn’t an ass kisser? Well, that’s a good question and one where the answer is…time. Many managers and business leaders will tell you, myself included, that an impactful dissenter is not hard to find, but hard to believe in and trust. Trust being the more important word. They can be a person that holds some authority in your business, or in my case, several sales associates that gave me honest feedback on a daily basis and I trusted them with certain decisions. Age never matters, as some of the wisest people I have had by my side are 15 years younger than myself. Thieir life experience has brought strong opinions and concerns to the forefront. 

These employees are not necessarily “sheep” in your stores’ world, but they do follow you. They believe in your purpose and maximize their efforts to support the business processes you have developed. They also share feedback when something is not working and have the courage to tell you when you are JUST PLAIN WRONG.  Every person in a position of leadership should have one. Two is best, but one is enough to right any path. Be careful!!! You never want to find yourself in a predicament where an employee is undermining your every move. They suck the life out of your business; you spend more time putting out fires from their impulsive mistakes and lack of judgment then empowering those same people to rise up and see the bigger picture. 

How do you differentiate? Again, time. The ugly truth always shows itself. Usually, they are the first to report you to a superior with exaggerations and falsehoods. They prey upon others to join their cause with a quid pro quo mentality. Often, they become the best of friends with newer managers or employees and use their influence to adopt a negative outlook of who is in charge. This type of dissenter has only one goal in mind…to have your title. They usually have never held a decision-making position and they feel wronged by you for some reason. It’s the “the grass is always greener” mentality. When their theatrics don’t play out, they usually leave. Yet another sad reality in running a business as they were probably the one you were developing to be the next you and they grew tired of waiting. Being a leader means you don’t take it personal. You wish them well, move on, grow from the experience and go back to empowering and building. 

Dissent will have many impacts on a business, but you are looking for open communication and an emotional intelligence that will build upon the belief of a positive end result not only for your business, but your business’s reputation and culture. Leading by example is not always enough, but leading with the courage to change your personal dynamic can be. Leadership and dissent should be the hallmark of a stores’ success. If you aren’t growing through differing ideas, then no one else will.

Restoration

I grew up on a sailboat. Pretty sure I was conceived on a sailboat too. Well at least that is what I tell myself. Water means everything to me. I am a Pisces, if you believe in that type of stuff. Many of the characteristics all make sense to me. The biggest one…I'm a dreamer. That is for sure. I have a million ideas and know that someday they will all become reality. At least that is what I keep telling myself. My husband, however, probably wants the reality to set in sooner than later. I am babbling. My father loved his sailboats. We had many. He even bought an old wooden sailboat to restore. It sat in our front yard until it was too far gone to repair. My point? Restoring ourselves is hard. Really hard. It takes a vast amount of courage and belief in your purpose. It takes a strong sense of character and a support system around you that is not afraid to tell you like it is. It takes time.

We go through many transitions in our lives and to those just starting out on your adventure I want to leave you with some advice. Make sense of who you are. Seems pretty generic, I know, but bear with me here. Through the years in my career, I changed my course several times. I often think back to the movie “Sliding Doors” or, in current times, any multi-dimensional narrative out there in movie land. So many options to take. Which ones are the best? How does a person decide that question? Is it financial stability? Career progress? Save a marriage? Health related? How do you make a choice that will affect you for the rest of your life? I wish I knew the right answer, but I can only share my experiences. The answer is... all of the above.

My career has been a roller coaster. All over the place. (Yep, a Pisces). Did I make the right decisions along the way? I left journalism school for business school. Switched degree programs and universities. Why? In looking back, I think it was because of fear. Yes, fear. I was in magazine and book publishing and I didn’t want to move to New York. Idiot!!!! So, I left Journalism and started over in business school. Seems so prosaic now, but it was retail, merchandising and management. Ooooo much more exciting! This restored my faith in having a career. After all, business is everywhere. Stores are everywhere. So many options for a career path;  buying, management, recruiting, operations, merchandising… I was revitalized! Until I wasn’t.

The one thing I know to be true is people need to believe in you. It only takes one to make you feel like crap and self-implode. I had that happen to me at the height of my career. So, I left and started fulfilling one of my crazy dreams. Entrepreneurship. I started my own business. I thought it would be a dream come true. I would be around for the masses who have experienced all that I have. I wanted to ensure they had the support I never had. I wanted to fill a mentor void I so desperately craved. I have, and I continue to do so, but I discovered I needed more along the way to fulfill the needs of others.  MORE KNOWLEDGE! Even after 20 plus years working in retail developing employees to be their best selves and leading many businesses to success, I wanted more. So, I made the decision to advance myself into the world of strategic HR. I have decided that in order to achieve all that I want, I need to know everything there is to start from scratch. I need this to revive a part of me that embraces employee empowerment and development processes.

I never thought it would be so hard starting over. At my age, a Gen Xer, starting over can be a crazy adventure in determination and deprivation. Studying for the PHR exam has been an eye-opening experience. I haven’t taken an exam or studied, for that matter, in 25 years. My brain has had to reach back into long-forgotten memories to figure out how. Through the course of this new adventure, I have learned so much more than I could have ever imagined. I have learned that many of the leaders, I have worked for over the years, should never have had those positions in the first place. I learned we drank too much Kool-Aid. Retail management means you are your own HR department. You learn from experience. Your policies were probably copied and pasted from other companies and your operations are a hatchet job of ifs and probable’s. Perhaps an employment lawyer signed off on your handbooks, but did they? Now I know this truth. I have taken classes and read over 1700 pages of text. I have learned from those in positions of policy and observed from afar just how much is needed out there. 

Now comes the tough part. What do I do with this newfound knowledge? Reinvent myself…again? I think back on the sailboat rotting in my parents’ yard. Am I going to end up like that? A pile of wood with good intentions of becoming something better or will I sail on the waves of Lake Superior with the wind at my back and set a course of discovery? Will I restore the person who had all the conviction to change the world one store at a time? The Pisces in me says I will discover a new land and live up to my potential. I better get to it.

Impersonator

The other day I was thinking about what was next on the horizon for me and it got me thinking about what I don’t ever want to be…an impersonator. I have witnessed many of these disappointments in my career. What do I mean by impersonator? I’m talking about co-workers or bosses with highly regarded reputations, but upon getting to actually know them…they resemble a sad display of humanity. You better sit down. This is about getting something off my chest. Something that needed to be said a long time ago. 

I always wonder how these types of people get to their current level? Why are organizational leaders not seeing through the masks they wear? Is it me? Do I not see the qualities that have made them who they are? Am I just not that open-minded or accepting? Do I hold myself to a different standard? Are my expectations of positive leadership on a different level? Maybe?

I once knew a manager who was a peer of mine. I was envious of her. She was the beacon of company culture and everyone thought she was the greatest thing since sliced bread, myself included…until she was my boss. The intrigue slowly fizzled the more I got to know her and this vision I had had of who she was left little to be desired.

She wasn’t a walk-the-talk type of manager. She may have been when she was trying to prove herself; when she first started out, but things change. Oftentimes she spoke highly of people to their face, but behind closed doors was nothing but a junior high school girl gossiping and putting people down. As a subordinate listening to her speak so horribly of people, I often left disgusted and wondering what the hell she was saying about me when I wasn’t around. This also left me wondering who else was engaging her in these discussions peppering her ego to protect themselves. I never agreed with what she said. Probably why we stopped getting along.

Maybe I was a bit jealous of her success. (I will admit that), but she never came across as a person I would want as a mentor or a leader I wanted to follow. Why did everyone else? I became frustrated and defeated in my position. I wanted to change things for the better and be allowed to think outside the box. Manage my business the way it needed to be not how people hundreds of miles away wanted it to be. It was a success and my people were successful, yet she made me feel like a bottom dweller. She constantly put me down, made me feel inferior and never had a positive thing to say. She loved putting me in my place and embarrassing me in front of others. Of course she would never admit that. After fighting too long for my sanity, I quit. I got out as fast as I could and never looked back.

Reflecting back on what transpired, I probably would have done things differently, but at the time I felt I had nowhere to go and no one to trust with how I was feeling. Those that witnessed this frustration, never would have supported me out in the open. It was a sad state of affairs and a true testament to the world of retail. It just goes to show you can never fully trust the people you have lifted up. Those you have surrounded yourself with. Those you thought had your back. It’s all about politics. The what’s in it for me mentality? The what image should I have to impress not the what strengths do I have that impress and empower mentality? Right from wrong.

Imposters are people we don’t speak about in normal conversations. People are always trying to protect themselves. Don’t you think it's time for a change? Retail needs all the help it can get right now. Wouldn’t you agree? I write this now because enough time has passed, and I have come to grips with the person I am and the person I want to be. I have no patience for games. I will not stand by and allow politics to play a more significant role than growth of my people or the belief in said people. I only wish I would have had the courage back then to say these things to the people who mattered. Would they have listened? Perhaps I never would have left a job I loved or perhaps I would have been slowly coached out of a job for having an opinion about someone so loved. Whatever the case, the past is the past. I know my truth. I hope you do.

No Exit

Have you ever dreamed of an exit, but haven't been able to find one nor had the courage to want to? Why are you staying in a position that is causing you to fantasize of somewhere else? Don't we owe it to ourselves to love what we do? Don't we owe it to ourselves to be surrounded by people who support us, believe in us and most of all challenge us?

“I wish I could just leave.” Said many.

If you can’t do anything to make your job life better then you have the power to leave it behind. 

But first… Ask yourselves these questions:

1. Am I doing everything in my power to be a better employee? Am I empowering those around me to be stronger? Am I invested in the well-being of those I manage?
2. What is making me feel this way? Have I spoken to anyone about my feelings? Are my feelings shared by others around me?
3. What have I done lately to contribute to the environment? Have I developed anyone? Have I exceeded a customer’s expectations? Have I exceeded an employee’s expectations?

I bring this up because it takes a lot to start over somewhere else. It is a job itself to find something new. I have found that many are just not putting forth an effort to make their jobs meaningful. They have grandiose expectations of what they should be doing without the mindset to actually achieve those expectations.

Everyday should be a learning experience, if you aren’t learning something about yourself or those around you, then by all means…find an exit. You aren’t doing anyone any favors by sabotaging their success and you sure aren’t doing yourself any good by not being the best you can be.

I have been there. It is a hard decision to make. You have a million different thought processes going on in your head. To actually come to the conclusion that there is nothing more you can do to mentally be happy in your job environment takes a lot of guts to admit to oneself. I am not talking about living on the offered salary or tired of the work load. I am talking about exhausting EVERY avenue and weighing its consequences on you, your team and the business itself. It is not easy. What you do in the end affects the entire business and YOU have to be ok with that. That is a huge burden to take on and one that you will live with. I think for this reason alone is why people stay in their jobs for so long. If you are feeling the desire to move on go back the questions I posed earlier. It will determine whether or not this decision is right for you.

Only As Strong

One thing I know to be true…you are only as strong as those around you.  Your people compliment you, challenge you and more importantly build the stepping stones to your management and leadership style. When managing stores, this is the only constant I have ever wanted to achieve.

Managing can be chaotic and challenging. 

• Why has it been so hard to attract the talent needed to achieve this team dynamic?
• Why is it so hard to fathom the training justifications behind this concept?
• Are managers afraid to find candidates that challenge them? 
• Are managers under too much pressure to fill roles? 
• Are managers putting too much time constraints on training opportunities?

Just a few questions I wish I could answer, but honestly, it isn’t up to me to determine the why’s, only how I did it. It wasn’t an overnight thing. It took a long time for me to trust myself and my ego. Will they turn out better than me? Get promoted faster? Get recognized by people you only dream of noticing you? Ego. Time to get it over it if you want a successful store.

Know what you are missing on your team. I wrote before of the trifecta. The perfect balance of skillset and the beginning of bench strength. You need these things in your stores to be productive. When you realize what’s missing, you need to go out there and find the missing pieces, train them and develop them. Find your you. Find the ones that may have more experience, but lacked a mentor. Find someone who is the opposite of you and learn from their mindset. The point is to not be afraid. Don’t feel rushed. Upper level management may pressure you to find a candidate, but remember, it’s your store. Only you know what works and what doesn’t work.

I have made that mistake before. I relied on upper level management to dictate my needs and the result was a disaster. Never again. I was playing politics and it nearly destroyed my management style and my management team. You also have to remember training takes time. Everyone is different. Sometimes people’s learning abilities are harder to develop. You need to learn patience and self-control. You can’t force people to master what you already know in a short period of time. It is up to you as a manager to determine how to best manage this important time. Remember to look around you. Who is best at ABC? An operations specialist shouldn’t train a new hire on merchandising. A short-tempered key holder should not train anyone on how to use the registers. Someone who processes shipment probably isn’t the best person to train on fitting room selling. I know that this all seems straight forward, but store managers work with what they have. Who is working when. The schedule says… so they do.

This is a failure in utilizing your people’s skills and abilities. It gets you nowhere and takes a toll on your teams’ character and most of all your reputation as a leader. Remember, you are only as strong as those around you. If they aren’t being empowered to grow, you might as well find something else to do. You will experience a turn style of lack luster employees and spend most of your time interviewing prospects instead of developing your teams. You will be fighting a never-ending battle of personalities and time wasters. Don’t fall into that hole. Take the time to find the missing pieces of your vision. 

A Passion

I am not here to throw anyone under the bus, but managers today need to WAKE UP! I am often asked “why do you do the things you do?” Meaning...why did I decide to quit my career and focus entirely on mentoring. The answer is I have a passion for people, processes and a belief that one holds the power to have a positive influence on others. 

I have had a rollercoaster of a career. I loved every position I have held and every person I have met, developed or observed along the way. I have been pushed, challenged and mentally exhausted from the ride. Why???  Working for someone that doesn’t believe in you or share your same passion for people is detrimental. It destroys any chance of growth, inspiration and positive results. Teams need mentoring, leadership, strong belief in purpose and an overall understanding that they will be supported. Only then will anyone see success in themselves, their stores and their people.

I left a job I loved almost a year ago because I felt trapped. I had nowhere to go to communicate frustration and no one I could trust to keep me motivated. Politics play heavy roles in our work life today (not talking about government politics here). People want to work for friends not bosses. Peers not leaders. No wonder why employees feel lost and abandoned. Too many cliques and too many abstract circumstances. No one is around to help navigate through problems. If by some odd chance they are, they lack the courage to help in fear of being coached out of a job for not playing the part of the cultures status quo. It is a sad state of affairs and one we need to continue to shed light on.

I hear from people on a regular basis that they are afraid to voice opinions. They are afraid to challenge and speak up about concerns they may be having. They have ideas about how to make the environment in-store better. They want to help make people more engaged. It really breaks my heart. Trust. Does it even exist anymore? I am not talking about confidants and keeping secrets. I am talking about listening to your employee’s feedback and having the bravery to do something with it.

I was on twitter the other day when @theclopener commented on a post of mine:

                        “Every time an employee gives feedback, a middle manager absorbs

                         its power and grows stronger. But only if they ignore it.”

Think about that for a second. I do not know who @theclopener is or where they work, but I do know the he/she has a point. Many managers take feedback from direct supports, peers or home office on a daily basis. The problem is they keep it inside and either make changes on their own without admitting to the feedback or ignore it completely and go on with their day. Feedback is always positive whether you are getting reprimanded or not. It is there to help you change for the better, make improved decisions, and garner a stronger self-managerial image. It can suck, but you need to think about the feedback itself. It came from somewhere. Usually, it comes from your team.

It is up to you to become the leader you want to be. It isn’t up to anyone else. You define your actions. Your superiors are there help shape those actions. If they aren’t…choose who YOU want to be and where your passion will follow. 

Longevity

I had the privilege of planning my parents 60th wedding anniversary party with my sister last week. The party planning itself took a few months, but the result was more than I could have ever imagined. Forty-two people came to celebrate my parents and one person had known my father for 75 years. He was the best man in their wedding. WOW! The party itself also made me think about spending 60 years with one person and the kind of dedication, openness and appreciation that requires. The give and take. The adjustments. The trust. Being the person I am and doing what I do, the monumental achievement had me also thinking about my career and what longevity has done for me.

Tenure is a crazy thing today. I never thought I would see people with one year at one company as longevity. I used to call that “job hopping” when looking at resumes and applications, now it is the new norm. I don’t understand why that is and it has forced me to ask some tough internal questions about those companies and most of all the management responsible for those employees. I am not perfect. I had people come and go throughout my career, but I also had some strong employees that stuck with me and the company through thick and thin. Years, in fact.

How? We learned each other’s strengths and opportunities, could finish each other’s sentences and most of all we learned through trial and error how to make our stores successful. This is not something you develop in less than one year. Sure, you can make dramatic changes that increase sales, but maintaining strong momentum over time and creating a positive reputation in the community takes longevity. That my friends is where managing with purpose comes in.

If you are a store manager, district manager or small business owner that has a lot of turn over, you need to ask yourself some hard questions. You can never control pay or payroll for that matter. You can only control your actions. Sure, money can make the world go around and life a little easier, but lack luster environments can make the higher pay scheme a terrible decision to an employee. More importantly, the question you need to ask yourself is: “Why are they looking in the first place?” From there, you need have an honest conversation with that employee. Put pride on the back burner and listen to what he/she has to say. It could be you. Maybe you aren’t the manager you thought you were. Maybe you aren’t providing a challenging environment for them. Maybe your processes need improvement. The point is…learn from them so that the next employee stays and grows with you.

My management philosophy has always been to be a manager that I always wanted. Sounds simple enough, but I took my own complaints and needs and put them to work developing my own style. I took the idea that I didn’t need to be loved, but I needed to be respected. I have high expectations and demand people to do their best at all times. I lead by example and am tough on those that don’t recognize their true potential. Delegation is key and being a chameleon to each employee has never ending possibilities for tenure. Your actions as a leader are the future of your store’s success. The saying, I am paraphrasing here, that people don’t leave companies, they leave people is so true whether you like to think that or not. It is up to you and only you to provide a nurturing environment where your employees can feel empowered and compelled to stay. It is up to you to hire the right people that fit your mind set and the right people who will challenge your mind set. It is up to you to develop a core staff and build a support system that allows everyone to grow and learn something new every day. Find a mantra and stick with it, grow from it and encourage it. Don't rely on a company's culture to keep employees, be a manager that people want to work for.