Sense of Self

To be a strong leader or role model you need to check your ego at the door. A strong sense of self in order to celebrate the successes of those you work with. It seems like a no brainer, but in reality, think of all the people that you have worked for that didn’t have that mentality engrained in their leadership style. It probably became a toxic work place and lacked any one person who stood out as a mentor. Am I right?

Mentors are needed in today’s environment. Recently I have been communicating with an incredible woman that I met on LinkedIn Julie Stonehouse-Daradics. She made the comment:

“Gone are the days when we are impressed with people who are impressed with themselves.”

I bring this topic up in regard to the continued conversation of making your stores or businesses a positive environment where people want to work for you. As a manager it should be a daily goal to make an impact on those around you. I am not saying you have to be a beacon of influence with every word or action, but you should want to set an example of one. Good lord people! Wake up! The society of “me” needs to change. The selfish mentality of “my success”, as opposed to “our success” should be the cornerstone of any successful business and tenured team. The two go hand-in-hand.

If you haven’t yet observed an employee, you trained…train another with their own twist from your coaching, then you have yet to feel a strong sense of self. This epiphany will bring such a sense of accomplishment and confidence to your leadership that you will be driven to see it again and again forcing others to embrace this frame of mind as well. A long-term goal would be to see a pattern within your stores hierarchy.

To get the wheels turning, let’s go back to managing the schedule. I know it seems like a jump from a philosophy to a task, but in reality, you have the power to transform your team into a positive force for overall success. Changing the MY to OUR with something as simple as how they are scheduled. Great leaders see strengths in people before people see it in themselves. This in turn manifests a certain skillset that only a tenured team can understand if tested consistently.

The prior blog post “Building Blocks” was about testing out your teams through scheduling to achieve business success based on the right partnerships. This post continues that example by using those partnerships into a typical week routine to achieve success of tenure and accountability. Sit down with your management team and go over all the tasks that need to be achieved on a weekly basis. Divide them into operations and merchandising. You cannot have a strong business without a routine scheduled around these two responsibilities.

Depending on the size of your business and management team, you should know your employee’s strengths and opportunities. The goal is always how to get the most done in the least amount of time, so the primary focus can be on your customers. Here is where the building blocks fall into place. Schedule to peoples’ passions. This includes support from a sales team. When you have specific people doing things they love, they want to share with others, therefore beginning a mentor program that adds efficiency, bench strength and employees open to more responsibility.

When you have the right people working together at the same times every week to accomplish specific goals, a well-oiled machine ensues. Your store will begin to run by itself so, you as the business leader, can focus on other obligations…EMPLOYEE DEVELOPMENT! Your primary responsibility! This will not happen overnight. Remember, you have to test it out over a period of time to see what works and what doesn’t. Believe me, it is worth it in the end.

No Exit

Have you ever dreamed of an exit, but haven't been able to find one nor had the courage to want to? Why are you staying in a position that is causing you to fantasize of somewhere else? Don't we owe it to ourselves to love what we do? Don't we owe it to ourselves to be surrounded by people who support us, believe in us and most of all challenge us?

“I wish I could just leave.” Said many.

If you can’t do anything to make your job life better then you have the power to leave it behind. 

But first… Ask yourselves these questions:

1. Am I doing everything in my power to be a better employee? Am I empowering those around me to be stronger? Am I invested in the well-being of those I manage?
2. What is making me feel this way? Have I spoken to anyone about my feelings? Are my feelings shared by others around me?
3. What have I done lately to contribute to the environment? Have I developed anyone? Have I exceeded a customer’s expectations? Have I exceeded an employee’s expectations?

I bring this up because it takes a lot to start over somewhere else. It is a job itself to find something new. I have found that many are just not putting forth an effort to make their jobs meaningful. They have grandiose expectations of what they should be doing without the mindset to actually achieve those expectations.

Everyday should be a learning experience, if you aren’t learning something about yourself or those around you, then by all means…find an exit. You aren’t doing anyone any favors by sabotaging their success and you sure aren’t doing yourself any good by not being the best you can be.

I have been there. It is a hard decision to make. You have a million different thought processes going on in your head. To actually come to the conclusion that there is nothing more you can do to mentally be happy in your job environment takes a lot of guts to admit to oneself. I am not talking about living on the offered salary or tired of the work load. I am talking about exhausting EVERY avenue and weighing its consequences on you, your team and the business itself. It is not easy. What you do in the end affects the entire business and YOU have to be ok with that. That is a huge burden to take on and one that you will live with. I think for this reason alone is why people stay in their jobs for so long. If you are feeling the desire to move on go back the questions I posed earlier. It will determine whether or not this decision is right for you.

Memory

               “She remembered who she was and the game changed.”  -Lalah Deliah                                                                                                                           

I read this the other day and It felt so fitting in regard to who I am and what I am doing with my life. It hit me right in the heart and it was just what I needed to persevere and keep going. I have been struggling. I am not sleeping. Not eating right. Drinking too much. Asking myself if I am creating value? Am I being all that I can be? Am I going to make it? Self-Doubt. I have been wallowing in it.

I didn’t set out in the world to try and change it, but I did set out in the world to try and gain and share insight. I wanted to be able to do something for a change. Be something I knew I could be without any restrictions. Be myself without someone telling me no or that’s not how we do things. Be someone who wasn’t fighting for every idea or belief. I lost faith in my power. My passion. My abilities. I lost faith in myself.

Working in retail can take a toll on you, your relationships and most of all, your teams. One piece of negative feedback can discourage you from remembering 100 positive ones. At least that’s how I always felt. I was working 70 hour weeks when I left my job a little over 1 year ago. It was killing me, but I always remembered how I got there and who got me to where I was. I was humbled by those that I had watched grow into incredible leaders around me. Those that worked hard along side of me. Those that supported me and those that believed in my vision. It was my time.

It is because of the countless hours training and developing people that I do this. When I remembered who I was, I said no to the negativity and politics and decided to begin again.  Wake from the monotony of going through the motions. Make an impact. Build teams to be strong and capable. Care.

If my memory serves me right…it really is up to you to do something. If I can.......... 

A Passion

I am not here to throw anyone under the bus, but managers today need to WAKE UP! I am often asked “why do you do the things you do?” Meaning...why did I decide to quit my career and focus entirely on mentoring. The answer is I have a passion for people, processes and a belief that one holds the power to have a positive influence on others. 

I have had a rollercoaster of a career. I loved every position I have held and every person I have met, developed or observed along the way. I have been pushed, challenged and mentally exhausted from the ride. Why???  Working for someone that doesn’t believe in you or share your same passion for people is detrimental. It destroys any chance of growth, inspiration and positive results. Teams need mentoring, leadership, strong belief in purpose and an overall understanding that they will be supported. Only then will anyone see success in themselves, their stores and their people.

I left a job I loved almost a year ago because I felt trapped. I had nowhere to go to communicate frustration and no one I could trust to keep me motivated. Politics play heavy roles in our work life today (not talking about government politics here). People want to work for friends not bosses. Peers not leaders. No wonder why employees feel lost and abandoned. Too many cliques and too many abstract circumstances. No one is around to help navigate through problems. If by some odd chance they are, they lack the courage to help in fear of being coached out of a job for not playing the part of the cultures status quo. It is a sad state of affairs and one we need to continue to shed light on.

I hear from people on a regular basis that they are afraid to voice opinions. They are afraid to challenge and speak up about concerns they may be having. They have ideas about how to make the environment in-store better. They want to help make people more engaged. It really breaks my heart. Trust. Does it even exist anymore? I am not talking about confidants and keeping secrets. I am talking about listening to your employee’s feedback and having the bravery to do something with it.

I was on twitter the other day when @theclopener commented on a post of mine:

                        “Every time an employee gives feedback, a middle manager absorbs

                         its power and grows stronger. But only if they ignore it.”

Think about that for a second. I do not know who @theclopener is or where they work, but I do know the he/she has a point. Many managers take feedback from direct supports, peers or home office on a daily basis. The problem is they keep it inside and either make changes on their own without admitting to the feedback or ignore it completely and go on with their day. Feedback is always positive whether you are getting reprimanded or not. It is there to help you change for the better, make improved decisions, and garner a stronger self-managerial image. It can suck, but you need to think about the feedback itself. It came from somewhere. Usually, it comes from your team.

It is up to you to become the leader you want to be. It isn’t up to anyone else. You define your actions. Your superiors are there help shape those actions. If they aren’t…choose who YOU want to be and where your passion will follow. 

Longevity

I had the privilege of planning my parents 60th wedding anniversary party with my sister last week. The party planning itself took a few months, but the result was more than I could have ever imagined. Forty-two people came to celebrate my parents and one person had known my father for 75 years. He was the best man in their wedding. WOW! The party itself also made me think about spending 60 years with one person and the kind of dedication, openness and appreciation that requires. The give and take. The adjustments. The trust. Being the person I am and doing what I do, the monumental achievement had me also thinking about my career and what longevity has done for me.

Tenure is a crazy thing today. I never thought I would see people with one year at one company as longevity. I used to call that “job hopping” when looking at resumes and applications, now it is the new norm. I don’t understand why that is and it has forced me to ask some tough internal questions about those companies and most of all the management responsible for those employees. I am not perfect. I had people come and go throughout my career, but I also had some strong employees that stuck with me and the company through thick and thin. Years, in fact.

How? We learned each other’s strengths and opportunities, could finish each other’s sentences and most of all we learned through trial and error how to make our stores successful. This is not something you develop in less than one year. Sure, you can make dramatic changes that increase sales, but maintaining strong momentum over time and creating a positive reputation in the community takes longevity. That my friends is where managing with purpose comes in.

If you are a store manager, district manager or small business owner that has a lot of turn over, you need to ask yourself some hard questions. You can never control pay or payroll for that matter. You can only control your actions. Sure, money can make the world go around and life a little easier, but lack luster environments can make the higher pay scheme a terrible decision to an employee. More importantly, the question you need to ask yourself is: “Why are they looking in the first place?” From there, you need have an honest conversation with that employee. Put pride on the back burner and listen to what he/she has to say. It could be you. Maybe you aren’t the manager you thought you were. Maybe you aren’t providing a challenging environment for them. Maybe your processes need improvement. The point is…learn from them so that the next employee stays and grows with you.

My management philosophy has always been to be a manager that I always wanted. Sounds simple enough, but I took my own complaints and needs and put them to work developing my own style. I took the idea that I didn’t need to be loved, but I needed to be respected. I have high expectations and demand people to do their best at all times. I lead by example and am tough on those that don’t recognize their true potential. Delegation is key and being a chameleon to each employee has never ending possibilities for tenure. Your actions as a leader are the future of your store’s success. The saying, I am paraphrasing here, that people don’t leave companies, they leave people is so true whether you like to think that or not. It is up to you and only you to provide a nurturing environment where your employees can feel empowered and compelled to stay. It is up to you to hire the right people that fit your mind set and the right people who will challenge your mind set. It is up to you to develop a core staff and build a support system that allows everyone to grow and learn something new every day. Find a mantra and stick with it, grow from it and encourage it. Don't rely on a company's culture to keep employees, be a manager that people want to work for.

Growth

What does this word mean to you? To me, there is growth in position and growth in mental abilities. Both are needed in order to have a successful team and business. I am not just referring to your people, but also to you as a leader. Over the years I have watched peers and employees grow into incredible leaders, business owners and vibrant members of the community. I myself have grown tremendously from what I would say was a strange and crazy trip from the years 18-the present. Who I WAS definitely has shaped who I AM. The struggles I went through have helped define who I have become as a manager, a boss and now a business owner.

When I was 23 I was promoted to store manager of my first store. YES…23! I find that to be an unusual fact about my management career (although now that doesn’t seem so weird to others).  I was fresh out of college and my boss left to have a baby. I think back to that person I was at the time. A 90’s club kid. If you don’t know what that means believe me…I shouldn’t have been running a multi-million dollar business, but I did so with determination to be the best store manager I could be. I soaked up all the knowledge and advice I could get.

“Someone believed in me and gave me the opportunity. They knew I could be molded into what they needed me to be and grow into the position they saw for me.”

–Me, at 23, becoming a SM for the first time.

Think about that for a second and ask yourselves, when was the last time you hired someone or promoted someone with this idea in mind? The idea that there was a spark in someone and YOU wanted to develop it so that person could meet their true potential and grow into a manager that you knew they could become. This has now become one of my favorite management style traits. It leads me to the best part of being a manager…developing 

My favorite position on a management team will always be… manager–in-training or key holder or sales/team lead or department manager.  Whatever you want to call it, they all mean the same thing, a developmental managerial role with keys. You have the chance to mold someone into a position that they themselves didn’t know they had in them. It is a position that reflects a spark you, as their leader and mentor, saw in them. It is a position that allows them to explore what type of manager they want to become. It is often the first time they have ever had a lot of responsibility and definitely the first time they have ever managed people. I like to observe how they handle the first day of responsibility and go from there by asking a series of questions in my mind. Will they become power hungry? Will they become an associates’ confidant? Will they embrace a way of thinking and become a leader? How will they handle a tough situation? What type of direction will they give? When will they realize that they are in charge and have to make decisions? It is at that time that spark happens in them. They either love it or hate it. When I see it, I start the development process and steer them in the direction that makes sense to them. There is no forced training plan or process, just an open mind to learn.

The same goes for any person new to a role. Everyone handles their new responsibility differently. It is important not to hinder their growth through trying to get them to learn the way you did. I have talked about being a chameleon before and now it is more important than ever. Your management training abilities have to be on point or you may lose that spark that originally got them there in the first place. No one wants that. No one wants to start over. No one wants to feel like they failed someone. This is how you grow as a manager and into a leader that can respected. An accomplishment that means something.