Just Listen

Have you ever pondered the question…Why do some employees learn faster than others? Or why do some people pick up on things as if second nature and others well…not so much? This is something that has become a case study for me over the years. One that is mesmerizing to myself and, as I heard recently from a luxury store manager, to her as well. Here is what she asked: 

“What makes one employee so naturally apt to complete a job with little direction where another will miss the mark completely even after thorough explanation? It can be as simple as alphabetical order; one can complete putting something to SOP and one cannot. What in leadership does it take to develop an employee to not only be responsible for their behavior, but to open their mindset about how their behavior not only impacts their environment but also can open their growth. Leaders are not magicians. They use their environment to find their answers and that alone is the transition that an employee needs to make to grow from follower to leader.”

Let’s break down what she says. First of all, there is no bad way to learn. Let’s get that straight. Everyone learns differently based on several factors. Education, upbringing, experience and habits to name a few. It’s not up to the employee to know everything when they are first hired or in a position for a long time. It is up to you as a manager to ensure they are comprehending all information in a way that makes sense to them and that they are doing tasks to fulfill a specific purpose. I want to emphasize that leaders ARE NOT magicians or fortune tellers, but leaders ARE supposed to be adaptable to employee needs. Each employee you hire comes to you with a different work ethic and different set of values. These are two things we cannot teach a person, but we can push them into a different direction if needed.

I had two employees hired at the same time. They had the same back ground, but one ended up being promoted much faster than the other one and over time became a strong leader herself. Now some would say I failed the second one, but I am here to tell you that each had different levels of training designed just for them and specific to how they learned. The second one actually moved up the ladder herself…it just took a bit longer for her to understand the needs and wants of the business.

The truth of the matter is it takes an individual’s conviction to want to succeed. There is nothing you can do to make one person want something more than another. Sure, you can use a transactual philosophy, “I will give you this if you accomplish that.” Or you can watch and learn. A trial by error philosophy that helps you reach a more defined transformational approach. This approach helps the employee feel empowered to answer their own questions and take initiative in doing job tasks. The reward deeply depends on a sense of pride in job position and the motivation of accomplishing something for the team.

The next time you have an employee that is struggling at the most mundane of tasks, ask him or her why? Don’t tell them they are wrong or what they did wrong or reprimand them for not finishing on time. Talk to them and find out what the problem is. You may be surprised to hear that they just didn’t know how to do something and were afraid to ask for help in fear of disappointing you. That’s when you can say you failed. You weren’t adaptable to their needs. You didn’t listen to what they needed in order to accomplish the task at hand. 

Many managers would say, “I told them how to do it” or “I gave them the SOP binder to figure it out.” That just doesn’t work. You have to find a way to get them to understand what is needed on their own. It sounds silly, but if you are truly listening to them with an open mind, you will be able to approach their learning mindset in a way to make them find the answer themselves. Your leadership style has everything to do with the success of your employees and your business. It is up to you to develop an environment where your employees are part of the big picture. It is up to you to design an environment where an employee knows that what they are doing makes a difference. They need to understand that although you are the boss, they are the reason you still are the boss. They lift you up. Make it an environment where, as a team, your business is successful. Believe me, they will want to learn as much as possible to support you.

Battle Tested

It’s true. I am. You are. We have been through it all. We have made good and bad decisions. Good and bad mistakes. We have fought an uphill battle and survived. We have fought a downhill battle and made it through without failure. We have failed. We have learned. We have grown.

Does this sound familiar? It should. Most managers have gone through it. If you haven’t then your time will come and it won’t be easy. No amount of ass kissing or trying to talk your way out of things will make a difference. You will be pushed to the limit. Stretched thin and lastly you will cower to an unwavering boss that thinks you deserve it because they think so. It sucks, but believe me, you will survive. It will define who you are as a manager, a leader and more importantly…a person.

Pretty dramatic? I know. I am battle tested. I have been there. At some point, you have to ask yourself whether or not this is something that you can live with. Are these decisions worth the time you spent solving the problem and not receiving credit? Are the hours away from your personal life worth the rungs on the ladder climbed to succeed worth the mindset that you deserve. Are the angry entitlements of your direct reports back stabbing you whenever they get a chance not knowing you hear everything worth the silence it takes to help them grow into better people worth it?

I asked myself these things everyday throughout my career. I had sleepless nights pondering what I could do to just make everything copasetic. Make my environment a bit more manageable. Coerce those around me to drink the Kool-Aid and jump on board someone else’s vison train. I hated the politics. I REALLY hated the politics. It almost destroyed me, but you know want? It made me the person I am today. I don’t care about that shit anymore. I care about you and helping those of you get through it. Like I did for 27 years.

Too old. Too opinionated. Soften yourself. Too masculine. Too soft. Too compassionate. Not compassionate enough. Handle change. Lead change. Bring about change. Don’t change. It is enough to make you sick. It did. It made me sick. Panic attacks. I was pushed, prodded and driven to levels of hell I never thought I’d see, but I survived it. Grew from it. Inspired a new sense of self from it. That is what it means to be battle tested, at least to me.

I’d like to think I made some type of difference in the lives of those I worked with. I hear I did. I watch them in their careers now and believe the insanity that we went through together meant something to them. It did to me. I am in a reflective state of mind these days trying to figure out my next adventure. I am not sure what that is exactly, but I do know I need to make a difference. I need to share my experiences. I want to believe in the abilities of people and push them toward growth. I know those things to be true. The world is changing. People care less about each other and more about themselves and how everything affects them. A selfish mentality that has made managing people harder than it has ever been. Why? What has changed? What will it take to make people like people again? 

A Passion

I am not here to throw anyone under the bus, but managers today need to WAKE UP! I am often asked “why do you do the things you do?” Meaning...why did I decide to quit my career and focus entirely on mentoring. The answer is I have a passion for people, processes and a belief that one holds the power to have a positive influence on others. 

I have had a rollercoaster of a career. I loved every position I have held and every person I have met, developed or observed along the way. I have been pushed, challenged and mentally exhausted from the ride. Why???  Working for someone that doesn’t believe in you or share your same passion for people is detrimental. It destroys any chance of growth, inspiration and positive results. Teams need mentoring, leadership, strong belief in purpose and an overall understanding that they will be supported. Only then will anyone see success in themselves, their stores and their people.

I left a job I loved almost a year ago because I felt trapped. I had nowhere to go to communicate frustration and no one I could trust to keep me motivated. Politics play heavy roles in our work life today (not talking about government politics here). People want to work for friends not bosses. Peers not leaders. No wonder why employees feel lost and abandoned. Too many cliques and too many abstract circumstances. No one is around to help navigate through problems. If by some odd chance they are, they lack the courage to help in fear of being coached out of a job for not playing the part of the cultures status quo. It is a sad state of affairs and one we need to continue to shed light on.

I hear from people on a regular basis that they are afraid to voice opinions. They are afraid to challenge and speak up about concerns they may be having. They have ideas about how to make the environment in-store better. They want to help make people more engaged. It really breaks my heart. Trust. Does it even exist anymore? I am not talking about confidants and keeping secrets. I am talking about listening to your employee’s feedback and having the bravery to do something with it.

I was on twitter the other day when @theclopener commented on a post of mine:

                        “Every time an employee gives feedback, a middle manager absorbs

                         its power and grows stronger. But only if they ignore it.”

Think about that for a second. I do not know who @theclopener is or where they work, but I do know the he/she has a point. Many managers take feedback from direct supports, peers or home office on a daily basis. The problem is they keep it inside and either make changes on their own without admitting to the feedback or ignore it completely and go on with their day. Feedback is always positive whether you are getting reprimanded or not. It is there to help you change for the better, make improved decisions, and garner a stronger self-managerial image. It can suck, but you need to think about the feedback itself. It came from somewhere. Usually, it comes from your team.

It is up to you to become the leader you want to be. It isn’t up to anyone else. You define your actions. Your superiors are there help shape those actions. If they aren’t…choose who YOU want to be and where your passion will follow. 

Be the Position You Want To Be

The biggest issue we have as managers is having the people in place who are ready for the next level, but they have no place to go. Am I right? At least in my experience, I have had incredible employees ready for the next step with no promotion in the near future. I guess I was lucky. Lucky, to have tenured teams, but it was always hard to watch them sit in the same position over time with nowhere to go.  I always told them to “be the position you want to have and adopt it as a daily state of mind.” It is never easy to have that kind of strength without push back from the employee saying that if “I am doing the position, why can’t I get paid for that position?” Good question…BUT the answer is always because the position doesn’t exist. “Stay with me here. Be patient. It WILL happen.”

Sometimes you have people in position that think they are ready for the next step, but in reality, they are not quite there yet. You have to ask yourself the following questions when reacting to their request:

1. Are they a respected leader in the store? Do employees come to them with questions? Are   they answering these questions correctly?
2. Are they leading by example in regard to policy, operations, and process efficiencies?
3. Can they answer questions that a higher-level manager usually answers without a higher-level manager interfering?
4. Are they self-sufficient or do they need to be given daily direction?
5. Have they instilled a work ethic among employees that others what to mirror?
6. Has the store incorporated processes that this person has envisioned in regard to their division of responsibility
7. How is their customer service? How do they react under pressure? Do customers love to see them in the store when they shop?
8. Lastly, are they getting noticed by district or regional level managers? Are your superiors asking about them in touch bases.

If you are able to answer any of these questions with undeniable evidence and your store has been generating positive sales with their help, then they are ready. Now the advanced training and development begins. It is now up to you to keep them challenged. You don’t want to lose them to another retailer. I recommend sitting down with them and the person who has the position they want and having a conversation about needs and wants. Then as a team develop a training plan to get them to the next level. The best part about this philosophy is that the person in the current position, with your guidance, does the training. It pushes both employees to be better and encourages a teamwork and empowering environment.

This is what keeps people. People don’t necessarily leave stores because they are unhappy, they leave because they aren’t challenged by their leaders. They become bored and stagnant and want to move on to bigger and better things. You don’t want that. Your store needs a core staff to continue to be successful. Customers want to see familiar faces. My advice to all of you out there with a person(s) up to the challenge…Do whatever it takes to keep them. Money is never an option. Especially in this retail environment. You have to make them see that and still want to be a part of your team. You need to be creative and push yourself to be better. You need to be a leader everyone wants to work for. This fact takes patience, accountability, strong communication and delegation. It also takes a mentality that your people may be more capable than you ever imagined and reach a level that inspires you. The end result is to watch people grow and to be proud of what you have accomplished in regard to your stores’ business. After all, isn’t that why we do this?

Be A Chameleon

I love chameleons. They are such a unique species. As their skin adapts to their environments they are camouflaged from predators and invisible in nature. They are beautiful and interesting. All of you should adapt the idea of being a chameleon as inspiration to do the same.  Not that you need to hide from predators or blend into your stores’ or business’s environment, but you need to be able to reach several different types of people on many different levels to accomplish the same goals. These goals are success in business and a tenured well-rounded team.

Every person you manage or work side-by-side with during your career is unique. They look different from you, grew up in various environments from you and their approach to learning is unique from yours. So why would you ever try to train them and manage them all the same? These are some of the most frustrating things to hear from employees. “My manager just can’t communicate with me “.  “He/she just doesn’t get me”. “I wish my boss would just listen to what I have to say”. “I don’t understand what I am to do and I am afraid to ask questions”. Now I am not perfect, I have heard many, if not all of these examples directly, but I learned from them and forced myself to take the high road and become a better version of myself.

Going back to the previous blog “Know Your People Before You Manage Your People”, you have spent some time observing. You have seen how they handle customers, peers and tasks. Now you can start developing them. Remember, no person is alike. You must adapt your training mindset to that of the individual. Some like to take a lot of notes and some like to memorize through observing processes. Some hate technology and some are computer wizards. Most people are passive in new situations and need a lot of positive reinforcement to gain confidence. Others believe they know everything and really take offense to fresh ideas. All of this can be frustrating when running a business and it is easy to take your frustration out on your people. It doesn’t have to be. YOU need to adapt! You cannot be a strong, successful leader if you don’t.

Your employees look to you for guidance. It is important that you prove to them why you are in the position you are in. Ask a lot of questions and make sure what you are communicating is clear. Maintain an open mind and be open to learn something yourself, your management style and your temperment. That is the best part. Learning from your people. It challenges you and keeps the open communication flowing. Maybe it won't work on everyone, but don't give up. If you can develop just one person to be a better, stronger, well rounded individual then next time you can develop two people. After all, isn’t that what it’s all about? The domino effect gives any manager or business owner a sense of pride.